Tuesday, February 26, 2013

WHEN LIFE SPEEDS UP

This morning I am struck with wonder at how rapidly my life is changing. I feel wild excitement in my heart but it is being tempered by a certain fear of  taking the next step into the unknown. I am so excited that within a week my book will move into publication, but I am afraid that I will not understand the technology I need to know in order for the book to be printed at all. In other words, how do the files on my computer morf into PDF and how then do I send those PDF files over the internet. It is a little scary to be challenging my mind at my age because I just might find that I can no longer do the nearly impossible; learn a whole new language and technical skills in one week's time. But I have faith in the Adobe Acrobat Distiller and believe that it will become self-explanatory after a little wrestling with its terms. However, if I don't exercise my brain, it will deteriorate into senior cereal and I'm not ready for that yet; I still have four more books to write-at least. Have to have dreams, motivation, and goals in order to keep growing into your 100's.

Now, after five years of writing and struggling to be able to afford paper and pens, I am suddenly living in The Ritz and am having the time of my life (however still struggling to afford ink and paper); exercising and on a good diet; being blessed with new great-grandchildren; learning that I can also illustrate stories for my grandchildren; but most of all feeling so happy and safe and so in love with God that my heart sometimes seems to burst with joy. And then there is the peace that seems to stay around me about 80% of the time and that is such a luxury after fears about just being able to survive; to remain sane.

Thank you for being my sounding-board. I am so glad to have this blog in order to talk to someone like you who, I imagine, has had similar feelings and fears, and joys. In fact, I see a door in front of me. My hand is inches from the crystal doorknob and the great unknown that lays behind the turn of that knob. But somehow I do not fear. I see bright light spraying itself across the sky behind the door. Yet, today my hand trembles in fear of what change will bring; for you never have change without commotion, whether it be happy or sad. Somehow, deep inside of me, I know that the door opens to a brighter tomorrow but a tomorrow filled with new work and challenges. I am almost ready, Lord. I know you will lead me through the doorway and give me strength to meet whatever challenges are across the threshold.

Tuesday. It shall be Tuesday of next week that I open that door and begin to talk about possible revisions and the steps necessary to go through each stage of the production process. 'Til then, I am still typing up the last 7 chapters of KOR and making sure all of my ducks are in a row.


Until tomorrow, may you have a high-energy day and get lots accomplished, even if what you have accomplished is just to think and plan for your tomorrow.  Mental work uses up a lot of calories. Maybe that means that we can indulge in an ice cream sundae after writing down a list of our goals. It sure feels like it!

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