We have been talking for the last few days about judging other people and yet remaining non- judgmental. We have learned to quantify another's character by listening to the number of positive and negative words that they use while they talk to us and others. If they use mostly positive words and actions then we can relax and allow a friendship to develop, but if they use a lot of negative words or actions, we know to steer clear of them as much as possible. But how about judging our own selves? Usually we are harder on ourselves than we are harder on other people.
We are our own worst enemy when we do not allow ourselves to love ourselves. In our culture it is deemed arrogant to love one's self or to have a good deal of self worth. Love of self is equated with standing in front of people and admitting to the world that you are a good person. Such chutzpah some people judge! What a lot of self-aggrandizement some will think, but what is the truth of the matter?
Each of us is a good person when we come from love. Then should we not come to ourselves in love and accept that while we may have flaws that we are a loving person and a good (positive) person. Good (positive) being defined as a person or act that comes from love; or in other words, the positive flow of life.
When we waste our time judging ourselves harshly-we all do things we are not very proud of because we are human beings and are not perfect-we have very little energy left to give love to others. We become obsessed with changing ourselves and stop thinking about what is happening in the lives of those who are nearest and dearest to us, and have absolutely no room left to worry about how total strangers are feeling. This becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy of self-loathing because we are centering ourselves on ourselves and do not have much energy left to turn to other people and worry about how they are feeling so we make quick judgments of new people and then just move along in our self-centered lives.
Let me tell you that you are a treasure just as you are and if you can come to a love of self then you will find that your heart has lots of room to love other people and we can accept their faults as part of their humanity and not stress about what we, or they, need to change to be better. Because most of us are doing the very best that we can, given our set of circumstances, and want only to love and be loved for who we are.
As humans we all need and crave love and if we can allow ourselves to judge ourselves leniently and lovingly then we will have a huge storage of love built up and can send that love into the lives of all those we come in contact with. You will be a huge blessing in this world and your love of self can turn into love for all of the world.
We are our own worst enemy when we do not allow ourselves to love ourselves. In our culture it is deemed arrogant to love one's self or to have a good deal of self worth. Love of self is equated with standing in front of people and admitting to the world that you are a good person. Such chutzpah some people judge! What a lot of self-aggrandizement some will think, but what is the truth of the matter?
Each of us is a good person when we come from love. Then should we not come to ourselves in love and accept that while we may have flaws that we are a loving person and a good (positive) person. Good (positive) being defined as a person or act that comes from love; or in other words, the positive flow of life.
When we waste our time judging ourselves harshly-we all do things we are not very proud of because we are human beings and are not perfect-we have very little energy left to give love to others. We become obsessed with changing ourselves and stop thinking about what is happening in the lives of those who are nearest and dearest to us, and have absolutely no room left to worry about how total strangers are feeling. This becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy of self-loathing because we are centering ourselves on ourselves and do not have much energy left to turn to other people and worry about how they are feeling so we make quick judgments of new people and then just move along in our self-centered lives.
Let me tell you that you are a treasure just as you are and if you can come to a love of self then you will find that your heart has lots of room to love other people and we can accept their faults as part of their humanity and not stress about what we, or they, need to change to be better. Because most of us are doing the very best that we can, given our set of circumstances, and want only to love and be loved for who we are.
As humans we all need and crave love and if we can allow ourselves to judge ourselves leniently and lovingly then we will have a huge storage of love built up and can send that love into the lives of all those we come in contact with. You will be a huge blessing in this world and your love of self can turn into love for all of the world.
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