Thursday, August 15, 2013

UNFEEDING THE BEAST

Today is Thursday, August 15th, and the third day in my battle against sugar addiction. I have been tempted and asked ONE to take away my cravings, and the cravings left me-for a half hour-only to rear its ugly head again and I have struggled by myself to avoid eating products with sugar or High Fructose Corn Syrup. By myself, what a laugh, I would actually be holding a cookie and be ready to take a bite when I would relent and ask ONE for his help again. I would then be able to put the cookie back into the bag and skate free for another half hour or so. This was repeated over and over again the first day, and half way through the next day. Then yesterday afternoon I suddenly realized that I was not thinking about food and had not been tempted for longer than I could really remember. I feel real joy right now because I am no longer sugar-snacking. Oh, I think about sugar filled treats quite often, but I have thus far been able to call on ONE and he has given me the strength to stay away from the sugar.

I hope that you will not feel as if I am making light of other addictions such as to alcohol or drugs, or to other major addictions such as tobacco. Sugar addiction is wide-spread across America and affects adults and children alike. Obesity, Diabetes I & II, blindness, neuropathy, loss of limbs, and other side effects, and there is a high mortality rate connected with these disorders. I just want to live and become disease-free and take much less medication than I am now. My only hope is to overcome my addiction (with the aid of ONE) and basically live without sugar, or very rarely indulge. And there you go, I am hedging my bets and imagining that I can actually have sugar without falling off the wagon. One use of sugar starts a chain-reaction of desire in my body and mind and I am back to where I was a day and a half ago, and begging ONE for his help in getting some control back in my life. Somehow, I must realize on a very deep level that I cannot have "just a little sugar" at all in my life. I am struggling to accept that idea; it feels impossible to never have sugar again. I just can't get my mind around the idea. That is what I shall work on now, but without ONE's help I will not be able to comprehend this fact. My mind is going around in circles.


Tomorrow we are going to be discussing the act of forgiveness: not to forgive for other people's sake, but for the health of our own bodies and spirits. Thank you for your support through these tough times. God bless and keep you in joy and in peace.

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