Friday, May 11, 2012

ANN EXPERIENCES INFIDELITY & THE MORMON CHURCH

Today Ann gives birth to her second child, faces Charles infidelity, and joins the Mormon Church.

THE GOD GAMES: Heaven & Hell...Chapter 20...HELL

When Charles was about to go to Vietnam, in 1965, he decided one day that we should have a second child. I was ecstatic and immediately stopped taking birth control pills. Within three days I was pregnant. I was so fertile that I told my girls when they grew up, that all the women in our family had to do was walk by a man and we became pregnant. This was born out in both of my girls and I warn my granddaughers now. Anyway, when I became pregnant in 1965, I began to pray for another little girl just like Debby.

There was a part of my marriage that made me very sad. When I married Charles I covenanted to be true to him for all of our marriage. I guess Charles saw things from a slightly different point of view. He seemed to feel that a man had different standards and anyway, he had a lot of fun on his cruises and used to tell the children that they had other brothers and sisters around the world. If that is true, I sure would like to meet these children-as would my children.

When it came time for our second child to be born, Charles left me at Navy Hospital and went to the home of my closest friend, Sue Ellen. I gather from what she told me that they started a long term love affair at that time. It was the first of many relationships that Charles indulged in.

Navy Hospital was a tough place to have a baby. They wouldn't let husbands be with their wives; instead, they shut you up in a room alone and closed the door. All I could hear were other women screaming. I determined that I would not scream and lay there bearing the pain in the dark; in the silent dark. Finally I could feel the baby being born and laid on the buzzer for the nurse. A nurse came and asked me what the problem was and I could not speak to save my life because I had spent my strength not screaming. The nurse went away after cursing me for bothering her. Finally, I could feel the baby pushing out and I lay on the buzzer again. When the nurse came in this time, I grunted and pointed to my privates, she lifted the sheet and could see the baby's head crowning. I was whisked into a delivery room and waited for the doctor, holding back on pushing. When the doctor came in he did not deliver the baby right away, but held the top of her head so she could not come out, while he waited for an intern that he wanted to show a certain procedure to. Finally the intern came and the baby popped right out. I think they hurt the baby during that delivery, but I had my wonderful second girl,  and I named her Rebecca Leah for she was also a very Jewish little girl.

It is only fair to tell you that I was not the best wife for Charles, and I can hardly blame him for cheating in our marriage. You see, the molestations I had endured turned me into a block of ice sexually. Charles never saw me naked as I was always dressed from head to toe in clothes, and would not take them off for bed; it was night cothes at nght to be sure, but I wore long flannel nightgowns all of our marriage and I would never take them off. Many years later I apologized to Charles for treating him so unfairly and being a cold fish.

Another thing that hurt our marriage was religion. I was overly religious and even belonged to the Woman's Christian Temperance Union with my grandmother. At first I was a Brethren, then I was a Baptist when no Brethren Churches were around, then I joined the Church of the Nazarene with my grandma. I was alwaus active as a Sunday School teacher and a pianist for the Youth group. Then, of course, I was married in the Nazarene Church and remained there until one day a big change came in my religious experience.

One day when Charles was overseas and the two girls and I lived alone together, a pair of Mormon Missionaries came to the house and I let them in and listened to their message. I loved the freedom to think that the Church offered, and I liked so many of the principles of the Church, that I decided to join in1967. I was re-baptized and given a blessing.

I loved the Church, but my parents went over the edge with worry that I was ruining my life and thought that I was joining a cult. They flooded me with anti-Mormon literature and sent over a person who did nothing but fight against the Church, to try to convince me that if I joined the Mormon Church I was going to hell. They were all worried about the plural marriage issue, and felt that the Church did not follow Bible teachings. They were all wrong, for the Church taught the Bible as well as the Book of Mormon, and everyone was a very strong Christian. I loved the Church and what it stood for.

I was a very active Mormon and the Church was very good to me and my children. One day the Bishop of our Ward (Church Building) came to visit me. He had learned from the missionaries that Charles was very anti-religious and that I was afraid of him because he beat and mistreated the children, and that several times he had slugged me. Once when he slugged me in the jaw, I had to go to the hospital to get my jaw put back in place, the police got involved in that incident but I didn't press charges. Anyhow, the Bishop had heard all of this and he came over to cousel me to get a divorce from Charles. He promised that the Church would take care of me if I got a divorce.


Tomorrow, Ann & Charles mend their marriage and Charles becomes a Mormon. They have a little boy they name Charlie...

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